How to Eat Alone Without Feeling Weird

Eating alone is one of the things women worry about most before their first solo trip. Will people stare? Will I feel out of place? Will it be awkward?

I've eaten alone in a lot of restaurants, in a lot of countries. Here's what I actually learned — the real problems, and how I handle them.

The real problems (they're not what you think)

The awkwardness isn't the problem. Here's what actually is:

Menus for two. In some countries, portions or menus are designed for sharing. You'll see set menus "for two," dishes meant to be split, tapas that make more sense in a group. You end up either over-ordering or skipping the shareable options entirely.

Restaurants that don't want to give you a table. Some places see a solo woman and hesitate — they'd rather save that two-top for a couple who'll spend more. It happens. Not everywhere, but enough that it's worth knowing.

That's it. Those are the actual problems. Everything else is in your head.

What I do

I ask for the best seat I can get. By the window, on the terrace, near the action. If I'm going to eat alone, I want a view — of the street, of the people, of something. Don't let them stick you in the back corner near the bathrooms.

I actually enjoy the food. I taste it. I take my time. I stopped rushing through meals just because I was alone.

Sometimes I look at my phone. Sometimes I don't. No rules. If I feel like scrolling, I scroll. If I feel like just being there, I just sit and watch.

I watch people. This is my favourite part. I make up stories about them — where they're going, what they do, why they're arguing. It's free entertainment and it turns a meal alone into something you actually look forward to.

The secret nobody tells you

Here's the thing I want you to remember, because it changed everything for me:

Look around. Really look. Nobody is watching you.

Every single person in that restaurant is in their own world. On their phone. Talking to the person in front of them. Thinking about their own day. Nobody has time to sit there staring at the solo woman by the window wondering why she's alone.

The idea that people are judging you is a story you're telling yourself. And once you notice that nobody is actually looking, you can stop performing and just enjoy your food.

And here's the other thing you start noticing when you actually look around: half the couples in the restaurant aren't even talking to each other. They're on their phones. Silent. Bored. There are more of them every year. And there you are, alone, enjoying your food, watching the world go by — and you realise you're actually having a better time than they are.

One more thing

Some of my best meals have been alone. No conversation to manage. No compromising on where to go. Just me, good food, and whatever's happening around me.

You'll be fine. Order what you want. Sit where you want. Take your time.

Nobody is watching.

Have you experienced this while travelling solo? Share your story with the She Wanders Safe community soon.